My Coming Out story

http://www.youtube.com/v/RTjxW-6x_7o?autohide=1&version=3&autoplay=1&autohide=1&attribution_tag=80SPjL3sMkzAXm5c2butYQ&showinfo=1&feature=share

What have I been doing?

Hello Homosapien... So 1st April  I had a mini photo-shoot to help promote a web-series I've created. To tell you the truth I'd call it more of an undiscovered head gem of mine. Anywhoha these last few weeks/months I've focused on this project so much that I've neglected the blog, but lets face this too, I never really blogged around one thing now did I, I am very erratic with how and what I post, which in turn I guess it is the reason I titled it "Mind of Rogue".

Funny how now after so long people around me are now calling me either Rogue, Marbie or Marbs , just what I wanted they've understood Scott is my actual surname not that "Scott is a rogue" lol. Yes Rogue really is my Middle name, deal with it.

Drunk Dialers in short, is about a group of men that attend one hour group therapy sessions with a Doctor who has some problems of her own (which involve some sibling rivalry). All of the DDs (Drunk Dialers/diallers) have a problem with alcohol one way or the other as well as one having a problem with drugs and another struggling with his sexuality.
For more watch the Making of: Drunk Dialers video via YOUTUBE.

So for you viewing pleasure here are some pics and videos of the Drunk Dialers so far.

Rogue Marbie Scott (I'll explain later)

Carlos Castro

Justice Inyabuutaiswa

Ashelly Goldman

Dr Jungal Juliajuice

Foreste Fern Evergreen (Dr Jungal Juliajuice's Twin Sister)

And here you can watch the entire series so far on my youtube PLAYLIST DRUNK DIALERS

 So thats what I've been getting up to. Spread the word and Subscribe to my YOUTUBE channel for updates on the series and linking videos from Ashelly with his makeup and healthy living tips. Or you can watch we rant on there too. 

Come and visit me on Facebook Rogue 'Marbie' Scott

and Twitter @RogueNScott

And a big thank you once again to those of you pushing me to keep creating, only Goddess knows, I'd probably snap and get locked up like Angelina Jolie in 'Girl Interrupted' if I didn't get all creatively spill out.

Drunk Dialers Update

Hello Homosapiens, so if you haven't seen much of my lately here's why, I've been working on a webseries called 'Drunk Dilaers' (Yes spelt incorrect as we all know when you are drunk you can't spell when using a phone lol) And today they will all be together in the same shot.

You can check out the first episode here.

Don't forget to share and like if you want to see more from these DD'ers.

I look in the mirror and don't see what others see

Hello Homosapiens, so I have embarked on a little project that I told you about Drunk Dialers and I'm enjoying doing it so much. My only question is, Why don't I see my work like others do? I wish i could appreciate it. Being creative is like body dysmorphia I guess, seeing what others don't see.

Any way below are episodes one and two of drunk dialers and I'll be taking a sexy picture of Dr Jungal Juliajuice later on today too. TTFN
P.S Drink responsibly.

Forgive and forget

Last post I am drinking hardcore, no fucking Dryathlon thank fuck!!!

My life is youtubed

So I haven't really write a proper post in the longest while and I'm blaming that in a certain somebody, who directed me on. New oath I didn't know I'd love. But have no fear I will be back... Hope you've been watching true vids. Xxx Marbie smile

Scripts.... How to?

Hello homosapiens.... Straight from my phone, a quick post. Meet some of the cast from post I'm working on. DD. p

28 days later, Dryathlon update

Hello Homosapiens...... So the month has been a cool one, we even had snow here in the UK which me and my Husky baby played with till, well when the arthritis in my hands kicked in. No seriously when it's cold my hand always seem to freeze in what ever position they're in (Good for a guy I'm helping out I suppose, shhh!)

So yeah.... I used the ticket. I'm such a bad person (But it's not like I'm Lance Armstrong, it was a couple of hours not bloody years), it was for a cause though that in my head was a perfect reason to add £15 out of my pocket for. Now I'm thinking maybe just 4 nights month I should have a drink (Yeah I drunk, drank, drink a lot) Or just special times. I mean it hasn't at all been hard and I may just keep on going. On no wait!!! I have a 40th Day Of Establishment party to go to and this is going to be big, on who the person is, (A friend of a friend, who I've become somewhat friendly with, not like that, I'm In a glass chamber waiting for the right one)

If you haven't noticed I been getting familiar with YOUTUBE lately, just something I thought would add a little more Marbazzle to you all. I really need to let you all know when a new word is going to pop your way.

TTFN and I STYS (speak to you soon)

What it feels like for a girl

Hello Homosapiens.... So for a while now I've been getting responses from women from all backgrounds, ethnic groups, ages and social backgrounds that I could get my question to. Some spoke to me in person, during meals and at parties, some emailed me, left a message on my phone or facebooked instant messaged me.
I've heard from the dawn of my sexual awareness, men don't like condoms and girls always want them. But then I've came across some girls that seem to think THE MAGICAL PILL is just as effective (No that just stops babies most of the time dudettes, not STIs), I always assumed they were under pressure to have unsafe sex, so I went in to dig a little deeper and feed my hungry mind. Girls, you shocked me. So my first girl, Tracey sent me an email, here it is:

Tracey, 26 year old

Condoms word association:

Gross. Unnatural. Mood killers. Stinky. Sticky. Saggy. Baggy. Delayers. Messy. The negative list is endless.

Basically, it's this. Uve liked this guy for ages. Had a bit of a flirtationship going on and FINALLY he's back at yours. You drink some wine. You giggle. The suspense is killing you. His hand brushes yours and you get those "fuck-me-now!!" fireworks in you belly. He senses it. Your eyes meet. He gives you that look then BAM you're kissing. Its better than you expected. Its sexy, sensual, erotic and you're instantly wet. Hands start wandering. Every touch is like electric. You find his cock and it's HUGE.... you know the rest. The amazing foreplay. The multiple orgasms. The sweat, the screams, the shakes. You want him in you right now and he wants to be in you too. Then he asks "you got a condom?" You rummage around in ur orgasm induced coma... both getting impatient... you find one (YES!)... you place it in his shaking hand... he's taking ages... the moment is slowly dying... you're getting cold and increasingly selfconscious about your naked body... now your not thinking about his huge hard cock, ur thinking of your lumps and bumps that he's had too long to analyse between the HOT-HOT-HOT foreplay... he's finally got it on and you can finally get that good hard fuck u needed do bad.

So he's in you and it's ok... he's got all the right moves, it should be great but the full sensation isn't there. He cums and ur not quite sure cos you can't feel it in you. His cock goes down and flops out of you, leaving the condom in you. So now you have a plastic bag in you, a dribble of cum down your thigh and ur feeling good but not 100% satisfied... then there's that awkward moment when he's gotta remove the saggy johnny from inside you. Least attractive moment ever.

Condoms... although they are potentially life savers, they fucking ruin EVERYTHING!!!!

And I obviously had to put this into video form so check it out!!!! xxxx Stay tuned  to hear more from other dudette readers and contributors, or even tell your own in the comments below.

What are your thoughts on condoms, girls? 

Mighty Morphing Power Marbie

Hello Homosapiens.... I had a lovely start to my weekends, dinner with Harley Quinn on Friday fro her day of Establishment and then dancing the night away on the Saturday getting her on stage at the Black Cap with Miss Loll Lasagne. But all ended so bad, Just metres away from her door step we were attacked by some drug crazed, mentally disturbed dude, (I'd like to call him something else but hey). I told her to run to safety, whilst I became this macho style Marbs, fending him off another one of our friends. He wouldn't back down, I still feel as if it was some sort of movie? Any way Police investigations  are out, apparently this guy has been doing this for weeks now, getting all the more brazen with his antics.
So my shoulder that got busted out it's socket a couple of months ago is busted again, my face is soar and beaten (So glad I'm not of the paler tone), jaw clicking, legs bruised, But guess what your Marbie did not go down, I fought him off and although I slightly battered, I've stood up and claimed my Mighty Morphing Power Marbie Medal. Never thought I'd have to fight for life, usually it's men doing that for me. (I guess watching dudes fight really helps, cause that round house and drop kick I gave him help a girl escape.)

Marbie's dudettes are safe and sound, the collective is stronger.

Now I just need to get back in to normal life and get some damn dewrinkling in.

(PS Thanks for the smile that almost came across my swollen fragile face with the video titled 'What gay boys do during sex' and showing your support, your sweet.)

Liebster award?

Hello Homosapiens.... I've just woken up and already I've had to tell one of my closest and oldest friends he may need to be a little more sensitive in the way he speaks to sensitive and self-conscious people. I guess I should have been a little more sensitive in how I delivered it to him because he too became self-conscious about his cut-throat, blunt ways. 

So a lovely lady has nominated me for the Liebster Award, Lia Minneapolis and up until now I didn't know what this award was. So I've decided to take part in the nominations process.

Rule of the Liebster Award:

• Each person must post 11 things about themselves
• Answer the questions that the nominator set for you plus create 11 questions for your nominees
• Choose 11 people with less than 200 followers and link them in your post
• Go to their page and tell them
• No tag backs

1) I'm a Leo (Western Zodiac) I'm a Pig (Chinese Zodiac) 

2) I was 3 months Premature and am thankful for that.

3) Naturally I'm a shy person

4) I got my first ever proper job 6 years ago (The shame)

5) I get told I'm creative and talented, I see it as I'm still struggling to find something that I can do for the rest of my life. 

6) Gaming on consoles is dangerous once I've started, I'm not a complete addict, but I have phoned in sick to work because I've played 19 hours straight and need the sleep. 

7) I absolutely adore animals and have been surrounded by them all my life. I've had horses, a donkey, dogs, cats, a pig, a hamster, a gerbil, a snake, birds (including chickens and ducks), Preying Mantis, a rat, Mice, goldfish and a Dolphin I used to feed daily, crabs and an Cayman (or crocodile)

8) When I'm alone I love nothing but the silence of hearing my own breathing and the tapping of the keys on my keyboard when I'm typing. It's the time where my walls are down. 

9) I love watching Horror films and find comfort in them before bed. Reality check, it's happening on TV not my life, which i should be happy about. 

10) I'm the Second/Third of 5/6 children but get treated most time as the only. (I say guilt issues their) 

11) I'm attempting at writing a book of my life growing up in the UK and Dominica. I have a photographic memory 

Answers to Lia Minneaplois' Questions:
1.) What did you do/Where did you go for your first date?

I was taken to a restaurant by the River Thames and walked along it, where I had my first kiss with this person on the pier (we're no longer together)

2.) What inspires you on a day to day basis?

The people that say I won't and can't

3.) What's a guilty pleasure of yours that you're normally too embarrassed to divulge?

I like to sing on Singstar naked when I'm alone

4.) What's the name of your first child and why did you pick that name? If you don't have children, feel free to answer this question if you have kids in the future?

Boy- Luciean Girl- Demonica

5.) What was the last compliment you got from a person? (what did they say)

I was complimented on the way my jeans fitted me. "You've got a cute little apple bum, don't you"

6.) What's the most drastic/desperate thing you've done in an effort to woo a past crush?

Nothing, apart from get to know them.

7.) If you had a magic lamp with a Genie, what would be your three wishes?

1- for floating buildings so that animal life can go back to how it was years ago, to many extinct and endangered species right now. 2- To be able to breath under water. 3- Travel back in time when i wanted to visit myself and people I've loved without disturbing the timeline continuum.

8.) If there is one moment or one event in your past that you would redo, which would it be and why?
I'm not sure I would, that would mean regretting something. Everything happens for some reason helps something else happen. Regretting causes negative energy and theres enough of that already.

9.) What was the last thing you watched on Youtube?

Mile Jai videos I think

10.) If you could be room mates with any person (dead or alive), who would it be?

Frank Sinatra 

11.) If you could be fluent in any language, which would it be?

Japanese (including writing, which is even hard for the Japanese so I'd be a pro lol)

My 11 Questions to you. 

1  What was the last thing you ate before you answered this question? (If you're eating now the meal/snack before)?

2  What other big event happened on the day you were born, what is that date?

3  You're given  5 tickets to live on Mars. It's now able to sustain organic life, who would you send and why? (I send send so you obviously won't be going)

4  What are you thoughts on CGI and hand drawn animations? 

5  If you're man would you like the experience of being pregnant? If you're woman would you rather the man becoming pregnant? (Seahorse style)

6  What are you most afraid of when you are travelling to a destination? Examples: work? school? Uni? another country? 

7 Where was your Great Grandmother born? 

8 What do you do when you're alone, that you're not necessarily embarrassed about, but have the feeling no-one else does the same?

9  If it was possible would you ever consider cryogenically freezing yourself, for a later date? 

10 What are you thinking of my Questions right now? 

11  What do you love to watch and could watch until the end of time (whenever that is)?

My Nominees:

musiquespoetry 

Jetsettingdivas

MambaRose 

Canitbeso

SingleUnsingle

SoundsenseUK

Carl Matthew Edwards Art

I write Thing I read things (no idea how many followers but love the blog, she's so sweet too)

Predefined Taste 

Gay Men (18+) 

Anton Maurice

Dryathlon update (day 12)

Hello Homosapiens.... So here an update on how I'm doing, I haven't really said how I'm doing just why. But I'mdoing fine with the no drinking. Last night I had a dream I was with a particular person on this little journey with me. It was freaking crazy, we were swimming naked in a ocean of alcohol and drinking the the alcohol, we noticed it changed to what ever we wanted to drink at the time. So weird. Any way here's a video I've recorded where I get unexpectedly emotional, talking about the death of my Grandmother who passed in 1992 from Cancer.

Do you know what it feels like for a Girl?

Hey Homosapiens... (Hey? Not Hi?).... I just had one of those light bulb moments and well I think it's gonna to make my mum wished she had put me under the water in a church that day (Never was gonna be possible I was a child from hell apparently)  So a little mini series is one the way. I'm just waiting for a few girls I know and have no fucking clue who they are but am happy they are participating, to get back to me via email. Tell then Homosapiens TTFN

Bad Kissers

Hello Homosapiens... We've all had an experience one way or another I'm sure. What I failed to say is I really do believe homosapiens with thin and I mean, try Matching up Jay-Z's lips to Cameron Diaz..... Yeah that thin, these homosapiens have no clue on how to kiss IMO!!!! and then there's those people who just weren't taught by anyone, kissing is an art not a battlefield get it right.

Looking out of the box and climbing right out

Hello Homosapiens...  I've been looking into videos lately as you can tell probably and find them that bit more personal in reaching you all. My personality seems to come out differently in videos. So I've decided to as the title of this blog suggests do weekly or monthly videos. Hmmm, this could be fun.

TTFN Dudes and Dudettes.

Marbie ditches alcohol for a month

Hello Homospiens, so I decided I was going to help raise money for the Charity 'Cancer Research UK'.  The fun part is, I won't be drinking for a month (The whole of January 2013) whilst doing so. Hopefully I can get a my local Police station help me out with a breathelizer thing on a daily basis so I can prove to you all I'm doing good. But here's my page where you can help raise funds.

>>>>>>>> Here <<<<<<<<<

I'll start my new Year with a a good cause, I intend to give to monthly, will you?

Please help.

'Happy New Year Dudes and Dudettes'

OPERATION: MARBIE START OVER

Don't hate me Homosapiens!!!!!! Marbie has been deployed back into the world of angry people.

Operation: Marbie Starts Over

Hello Homosapiens.......... As the new Year approaches, I have made a trend for myself to start over. New interests, newish style and lets say curls no more. I'll keep you updated on the mixed and curly front, but for now, remember how I am.
What have you chosen to do for the New Year?

As one life seems to end, another Blossoms

The Orchid flower is one of the most beautiful flowers in my opinion yet can be very temperamental without the right care. Blossoming sometimes for months in my experiences until the flowering season ends. Trimming the ends making the plant look like a tough leafed shrub lacking any beauty as it did once  and caring for the plant as if nothing had changed, is your best bet for it to blossom over and over again.

Being newly diagnosed HIV positive does not mean that life has to end for you, just like the Orchid a new life for you too has started to bare its buds and is striving to blossom, you only need let it.
Speaking to a friend of mine who in 2003 found out about their status and was understandably devastated, they told me once they had found out life to them became more important than what they had thought of it. In their words “Life was just a play it day by day sort of thing. No real meaning, but now there’s so much I can see that I didn’t before.” They said that life before being diagnosed was in fact one big party, never sticking to a job and stumbled from city to city in the UK. Finding out forced them to become in their words again “Grow up” and take charge of their life. That same friend is in a relatively well paid job and has being climbing up the ladder in their industry, bettering themselves for years now, they live alone, party with friends and now is planning on having a child, biologically, so you see life for them has blossomed and continues to.

How does one living with HIV have children? I asked myself that same question, but where there’s a will there also may be a way, the way is treatments. I came across the term ‘Sperm-washing’ and had no clue what that meant, in fact I thought if the male partner was positive then he’d ejaculate in a cup and somehow washing the sperm in a soapy substance. Sperm washing rests on the premise that HIV-infected material is carried primarily in the seminal fluid rather than in the sperm itself. The technique which is used separates sperm from seminal fluid. When the sperm has been washed, there are many ways it can be used. The simplest of these is to perform a technique called intra-uterine insemination (IUI), where the washed sperm is placed directly into the uterus of the female partner. This is done when she is most likely to get pregnant, so around her ovulating cycle. If there are any other fertility problems that may occur there are procedures that you may be familiar with like IVF (In vitro fertilisation) eggs are inseminated with the washed sperm  and ICSI (Intra-cytoplasmic sperm injection) where they directly inject the sperm  into the egg. However if the female is the one which is positive, she would have to carry on taking her treatments as normal or be advised to switch treatments for the health of the baby. I also heard that having a cesarean can lower the risk of transmission to the unborn baby. In all scenarios the viral load of the person would be advised to be undetectable before and would be monitored throughout the pregnancy.

The future gets brighter everyday and as most people walk through life, they find themselves in relationships too. Find another Orchid to make a lovely hybrid is not an easy task, but when you find the right compatible partner life for you can have new blossoms of joy.
Rushing into things is not advised, too many young people have done so and without the right education and protection have received news they did not expect. Take your time and by all means be honest to yourself about what you intend to gain from a partnership. As many good well intentioned people there are in the world there are those that would, I would say be “The snakes in the grass with the venom on their tongues.” I’m not saying keep your status to a minimum, but you don’t particular what to start a journey with someone that understandably you don’t want every Tom, Dick and Sarah knowing about your HIV positive status, because yes it is still an untalked about issue amongst many whom may not be as educated as you, the last thing you want is added stress in your life. On the positive look on your endeavours of find a possible partner, you should be honest with them once you feel you can trust them, get to know them before become physically intimate.
Many social networking sites out there especially amongst the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered communities (LGBT), social networks allow you the option to disclose your HIV status or not.
Because you are becoming more knowledgeable of the virus and you now know that just because a life you thought you had has ended, another and many are about to begin, remember the most important thing is to take care of yourself, love yourself and through doing this you inturn will be able to protect others and hopefully find your partner you decide you want to have a life with.
Life as you know it, has not ended, it’s just found a beginning to a new path you can enjoy once again.

You're human, so they say but inside we're more Animal

Hi Homosapiens.. So couple of months ago I had to get my Husky Kiara spayed, due to the fact that I didn't really want a house full of puppies and nor did I really want her to bleeding all around my house and I was not going to have her wearing sanitary towel and also I don't actually trust any of the locals in the area in which I live  to have vaccinated their dogs. She was becoming of the age where she would've secreted that oh so lovely smell all horny dogs want a bitch to make, thus I had to give her the snip. You see that's how animals operate they give out a scent for the others to know that they're ready to procreate letting all those around them  know that they are ready to fuck. Sometimes animals give off another scent, to ward off other animals as a defence mechanism but the mechanism that I'm talking about is the mechanism of lust, the mechanism that she drives others crazy sexually. (Random thought, the only other  mammal known  other than man to have sex for enjoyment is the Dolphin, I'm sure apes do also as it has been recorded they masturbate in private or in groups, surely that's for sexual reasons I mean why else would they do it?)

Let's talk about pheromones, so I'm assuming that you know what pheromones are if not let me break it down for you, pheromones are a chemical secreted by animals especially in insects and yes  mammals too that influence the behaviour or development of  others of the same species, commonly used to attract the opposite sex however I'm sure it works the other way round also.

There has been huge debate about the existence of human pheromones, whether they work on humans, and how strong they are. I'm going to bat for the team that says pheromones are up on full force, simply for the fact that when one goes out and is feeling quite sexual I find I get a lot of attention and although body language may play a part in my feeling sexual and getting attention, I'm often with my friends laughing and drinking so the body language there is not saying "Come and get me boys" as if I was Nicole Kidman gliding down from centre-stage on a swing in the movie titled 'Moulin Rouge'.
So when one is seeking a partner and they're not wearing any fragrance (because we all know that fragrance/ odour can play a small part in the selection of a concubine or what have you), do they secrete these pheromones? I'm absolutely sure they do, because most chances are when seeking a partner they attract many partners often enough maybe not the partner they want but inevitably they got that attention. I find that when I'm out with my friends after a few drinks I often do feel quite sexual and want some harmless, flirtatious attention, then attention comes, from a greasy looking guy that I wouldn't go for or a girl who has obviously not caught on that I'm gay yet, so you just have to politely say "Sorry not interested"and depending on how I'm feeling and how annoying they're becoming it's a simple, turn my head away and continuing with my night for a proper suitor to come my way.

It is said if a dude and dudette are in a relationship and he is secreting enough pheromones he can have an effect on her menstrual cycle, which would accelerate and increase fertility leading to pregnancy in the likelihood that she is able to conceive. Whilst there is no say how a dudette's pheromones would affect a man, given the reputation of the male species of the homosapien race, it wouldn't matter anyway if they did have any effects, men are so-called more hornier and then females anyway (So not true I know so randy dudettes as I'm sure you do are are one yourself). There has been some studies set out to see if pheromones are sexual orientation based and whilst I can say the gaydar is possibly the best pheromone that domains I'm not too sure it is sexual orientation based, women talking to gay men sometimes assume a man is free, single and most of all not gay, not getting signals from him in the conversation or body language, but his pheromones. So his pheromones obviously are on but are not triggered for her, so I don't believe in the sexual orientational based pheromones, unless of course scientists come up with a reason to say in these circumstances the  human brain is now malfunctioning and scrambling  signals (Which is why we get fag hags).

So are we more alike and more in tune with our animal counterparts? Yes, we can sniff out the perfect partner (or partner for now) by sniffing out the genetics which we do obviously without knowing, just like the heart beating we are unaware what we are doing and when.  In my line of work when I don't know when an item of clothing belongs to someone i.e a child I sniff it, they all have they're own smells, not pheromones but (little piece) proof that we are closer animals than you'd think.

Apparently Dolphins enjoy threesomes also

Pheromone parties fancy that.